We used to chase that boy home from school
We called him freckle faced red headed fool
He was different, he wasn't cool like me
Sticks and stones didn't break any bones
But we never left well enough alone
One day he ran away from home you see
And I passed him as he walked away
And in his eyes I heard him say

One of these days you're gonna love me
You'll sit down by yourself and think
Of all the times you pushed and shoved me
And what good friends we might have been
And then you're gonna sigh a little
And maybe even cry a little
But one of these days you're gonna love me

Patty Sue was a small town beauty
I took one look at her and had to pull her to me
Lord knows she should have seen right through me
When I promised her the world
But at 17 you only want one thing
I left her standing with my high school ring
Innocent tears in a pourin' rain
As I walked away
And I still see her in my dreams
And to this day she's whispering

One of these days you're gonna love me
You'll sit down by yourself and think
About the time you turned from me
And what good friends we might have been
And then you're gonna sigh a little
And maybe even cry a little
But one of these days, you're gonna love me

Now everybody stands up
The congregation sings
It's a song of sweet forgiveness
And as the chorus rings
The wind blows clear my memory
The pages start to turn
And suddenly I'm singing
The moment that I learn

One of these days I'm gonna love me
And feel the joy of sweet release
One of these days I'll rise above me
And at last I'll find some peace
And then I'm gonna smile a little
And maybe even laugh a little
But one of these days...
I'm gonna love me
-- Tim McGraw

This past week has been both joyful and heart-breaking.

Vegas was nice. The highlight was seeing Ka.

But watching my family react to my grandmother's pnemonia plus two seizures isn't something I'd wish on anyone. The emotional breakdown was enormous, there was a terrible fear that hovered over all of us. Seeing that small woman, who is 4"11 and wears a size 4 shoe in a ICU bed made her look all the more tiny. At sevenity-nine her hair is still a chestnut brown hair, unbroken by silver or gray. Her face is not weathered, but as soft as a peach - it almost made me afraid to touch her hand, so delicate her skin was, but I felt it may lose its luster the way butterfly wings do when touched.

She's doing better now. I'm at the hospital on a cot, laying beside her with my grandfather on the other side. There's been no more seizures, but she'll have to be on oxygen when we return home. Our heavenly Father gave her back to us, and we'll be taking her home tomorrow. Abba is always showing us grace and we will carry her the rest of the way as long as He wants us too.

Alzhimers is a terrible disease. It kills without killing. The grandmother I grew up with is gone, I only see her in rare coherent moments. But they're precious, every one of them. Every time she smiles I realize the mercy in which Abba gives us mortals to carry on while we lose the things we cherish the most. He brought our family together during a horrific time, and now He's healing us together. We will get through this. We won't put her in a home. We cannot abandon our family, no matter what. It is one of the gifts we are given, and thankfully, that gift grows exponentially over time.

I know I'm at risk for the same disease, as is my mother, but I know that if that day ever comes - I would be so lucky to have the same kind of loving family that I grew up - and continue to grow up - in.

Abba thank you for giving her back to us. Your grace is eternal. I now know without a doubt that Christ has lit the fire in my heart. He has given me strength when I want to buckle. He has given me patience when I want to scream.

I am so blessed to have Abba as my Father, and his Son as my guide.

Amen.